Thursday, August 6, 2009

Carpal Tunnel, who knew?

I've recently learned that many women have been victim of this "my generation" (my call, nothing official) thing called Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, but no one in my "parents' generation" had it that I can recall. What, the doctors didn't know about it? Makes ya go "hmm" doesn't it?

I had the CTS surgery last Thursday (one week ago). Post-op instructions were minimal: Take Ibuprofen 600 3x a day if needed and elevate your hand above your heart; keep dry. That's it! Seemed simple enough, surly I could do that, right? Humpft, silly woman I am.

Murphy's Law #712: When you need it the most, it will break
Now remember, all the while, our air conditioner has been on the blitz for a least a week, maybe a tad more. Murphy's Law in full effect here, who knew the temperature here in Oregon would break record HIGH levels? Let me stress, we had a heat wave hit us with 108 and 109degree days! Oh my gawd! It was 96degrees inside the house, and here I am wrapped like a mummy up to my elbow. Did I mention that a sweaty wrist, when bandaged up, itches like hell? You know there's nothing more frustrating than an itch you can't get to; ask anyone who's worn a cast; or ask a dog who skootches his behind across the living room carpet. Aarrgghh!! Oh, but I digress.

Hubby and I filled my prescription on the way home from my surgery. Now, you must picture this: groggy old woman with one half her arm wrapped like a mummy standing at the pharmacy counter, sweating profusely to boot. Key words here would be HAND SURGERY + PRESCRIPTION BOTTLE. Did the pharmacist miss my bandages? Surely not? Did that idiot give me an easy-to-open bottle?? Don't be silly. But I was still groggy from the anesthesia, so I wasn't thinking clearly. You know what this means? I blaime my hubby and that stupid pharmacist at Walmart. Stick with me here and you'll understand.

The rest of Thursday there was new, strong tingling in my fingers. It finally went away after 24hrs of my freaking out about it, whew. "Well that was a fun trip! ... Not!" Did the doc mention that might happen? Ha, silly woman, don't be ridiculous.

This was followed on Friday by a stabbing electrical pain in the pad of my thumb. "Ouch, ouch, dang, IS THIS NORMAL??" Well who knew, since neither the doctor's office nor anyone at the surgical center say a word about "stabbing pain". Good grief, do I have to teach the freaking world how to communicate? Ahh, but I digress. Sigh, why me? (lol).

Murphy's Law #12: A helping hand is never around when you need one
Now here's another Murphy's Law experience... I couldn't open the damn bottle of Ibuprofen! Not with only one hand for Pete's sake! As I said, it was NOT in an Easy-To-Open bottle, oh noooooooo. And my hubby was a work. I thought of my neighbor across the street, ahh, he could open this for me. NOPE, he wasn't home. Crap, crap! My next door neighbor is elderly and doesn't answer the door if she doesn't know you're coming, and didn't answer the phone. Crap, crap, C R A P!! Needless to say, I was getting rather bitchy at this point. Who knew, huh?

The Calvery Arrives
My out-of-state girlfriend called, so that gave me the opportunity to whine, bless her. She had a great idea; she suggested I take that drug bottle out to the garage and use the vice! Well, I did it and managed to get that stupid bottle open using only one hand. The manager at Walmart is going to hear about this the next time I go there. Seriously, of all the idiotic things, one would expect the pharmacist to notice, wouldn't he? Yeah, who knew.

Don't expect the doctor's office to tell you everything you NEED to know, and don't expect your local Pharmacist to actually use the common sense God gave him. Who freaking knew?

PS: Murphy's Law, and the whole concept is not my idea, and I have no clue how many there are nor what numbers any might be, but the damn thing haunts and taunts me daily, lol